“The data reveals a clear pattern: People are interested in people like themselves. Women on eHarmony favor men who are similar not just in obvious ways — age, attractiveness, education, income — but also in less apparent ones, such as creativity. Even when eHarmony includes a quirky data point — like how many pictures are included in a user’s profile — women are more likely to message men similar to themselves. In fact, of the 102 traits in the data set, there was not one for which women were more likely to contact men with opposite traits. Men were a little more open-minded. For 80 percent of traits, they were more willing to message those different from them. They still preferred mates who were similar in terms of height or attractiveness, but they cared less about these traits — and they didn’t care much at all about other things women cared about, like similarity in education level or number of photos taken. They cared less about whether their match shared their ethnicity.”
“Inaccurate data is a problem because it can lead to unsuitable matches, so some dating agencies are exploring ways to supplement user-provided data with that gathered from other sources. With users’ permission, dating services could access vast amounts of data from sources including their browser and search histories, film-viewing habits from services such as Netflix and Lovefilm, and purchase histories from online shops like Amazon.”
“Authenticity on the web is a slippery idea. Deep down we all want it (that’s human nature!), but earnestness on social media isn’t just uncomfortable, it’s embarrassing. Sites like Facebook and Twitter have conditioned us to believe that we deserve to be listened to—not just by our family and intimate circle of confidants, but also by the 900 “friends” we have on Facebook. The things we share tend to be superficial, impersonal and self-promotional. There’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, I’d argue that’s the way it should be. Those 900 friends on Facebook aren’t our therapists, so there’s no reason we should act like they are. But Bader and Byttow like to believe there’s a place for a more authentic web, and they hope Secret will give rise to it. In this imagined digital utopia, snark will be replaced with self-awareness and kindness. Under a thin veil of anonymity, people will be able to say what’s on their mind no matter how cheesy, horrifying or lame it might be.”
“Thirty-one percent of respondents’ most recent first dates stemmed from an online connection. It edged out meeting through a friend for the first time ever. Friend-of-a-friend connections accounted for 25 percent of first dates. Meeting through work came in third place, with 8 percent of singles getting dates that way, while meeting at a bar came in last with 6 percent. Dr. Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist and chief scientific advisor for Match.com, confirmed to Betabeat that this is the first year online dating beat out any other way of clinching a first date.”
“Remembering is traditionally a social enterprise. One person knows how to cook a turkey. A partner recalls how to fix the leak in the sink.
The Internet changes everything. With nearly ubiquitous online access, many people may first perform a smartphone search rather than calling a friend.
Being online all the time changes the subjective sense of self as borders between personal memories and information distributed across the Internet start to blur.”
“And in the digital era, the teen bedroom has glass walls. Everyone can weigh in. “When your picture is ‘liked’ and commented on, it is a great boost of self-confidence and brings along much gratification,” writes one 16-year-old explaining the appeal of Instagram on a parenting website. The fact that these sites are social means you know whether people are paying attention to the aesthetic identity you’re working so hard to craft. I can only imagine the power that the like button would have held over me during my tween years. Modern adults aren’t immune, either. A survey of American mothers earlier this year found that 42 percent suffered from “Pinterest stress — the worry that they’re not crafty or creative enough.””
“"Reaction to disappointment and reality testing occurs more quickly face to face," Sandberg said in a statement. "There is a narrowness with texting and you don’t get to see the breadth of a person that you need to see." The pair surveyed 276 young adults around the country; 38% were in a serious relationship, 46% engaged, and 16% were married. One big (and, yes, obvious) takeaway from the study is that text messages are a standard way of communicating for most couples: 82% traded texts multiple times per day.”
That’s the percentage of Internet users who say they believe that online dating is a sensible way to meet people and make matches. (That’s up 15 percentage points from 2005.) (More data on online dating here.)